Not the Bank of Love
My Friend,
It is hard to take in, but in order for a relationship to thrive, each person needs to be willing to be the one who loves more – and do it freely. We tend to think of relationships as investments and if we’ve put X in, we expect to get Y out. But sometimes the very expectation is what keeps what we really want from coming to us.
This is not to say that we can’t ask for Y, or make deals to have Y happen, but to put it in terms of “Hey, I did blahblahblah, you should lalala” can be a real joy killer. No one wants to live a “should-y” life. Instead, consider doing something scarier: be real about what it is you’re offering… And what it is you’re looking for.
Wishing the best,
Kaye
P.S. Of course, if you are dealing with someone who will take hearing your needs as a way to hurt you, we are outside of the scope of this particular tool and I suggest finding some additonal and professional support. This tip best when both people are interesting in having, keeping, and maintaining healthy partnerships.
